Building Relationships Throughout Your Recovery

Entering rehab and starting the recovery process can completely transform every aspect of a person’s life. Throughout recovery, having healthy relationships and support networks can be the deciding factor between staying sober and relapsing.

This article highlights the different threats addictions pose to relationships. We’ll look at ways to nurture new, long-lasting relationships and develop meaningful connections conducive to lifelong sobriety.

Why do so many relationships crumble before recovery?

Deciding to enter rehab often comes after enduring tumultuous times that have deeply strained, and in some cases destroyed, the bonds holding relationships together. Social, romantic and even familial relationships are not immune to the depths an addiction can plunge someone into.

Each type of relationship can be affected by substances in unique ways:

Relationships with friends: Our relationships with friends can be quite distinct from the ones we have with our family or a partner. Friendships often involve a sense of escapism, providing a haven from life’s pressures. You might call them and share a drink when you’re going through a tough time. You blow off steam with them, raising your troubles for advice or even to vent. Then, when the night winds down, you both return to your family or spouse, with whom you generally spend more of your sober time.

Romantic relationships: Substance abuse can plague romantic relationships for years before entirely breaking them. In the earlier stages of dating and romance, a boyfriend or girlfriend may be more willing to look past their partner’s substance addiction, hoping that it can later be changed or fixed. Psychologists and addiction experts describe this as enabling the other’s addiction. For longer relationships and married couples, unaddressed addictions can correlate with physical, psychological, or sexual abuse, resulting in painful outcomes like divorce and a disrupted childhood.

Family relationships: The strains on family relationships caused by addiction may be the most painful to bear. Families witness the highs and our lowest of lows, sometimes stepping in to provide financial help. Deepening addiction can lead to impaired performance at work and job losses. Family members are who we often turn to for financial help, and the shame of addiction can lead people to secrecy and deception. As trust breaks down between members, family cohesion suffers along with it.

Why relationships are so important during recovery

Relationships are critical for recovery and foundational in healing and personal growth. In fact, they can often be the deciding factor in achieving long-term sobriety. Going through rehab can be an incredibly trying time, but by actively working on healthier relationships, the challenges become easier to manage.

Some of the immediate benefits of healthy relationships in recovery include:

A sense of belonging and connection

Recovery often involves a complete lifestyle shift, especially for those whose social lives revolve around substance use. For many, meeting friends at a bar or pub is a way to unwind and a primary source of emotional connection. Losing this familiar routine can feel unsettling and isolating.

This is where supportive relationships become invaluable. Having people to confide in and share struggles with gives the sense of belonging needed to navigate recovery’s challenges. These connections help develop healthier coping strategies and support group recovery.

A way to stay accountable

Another substantial challenge for people in recovery is the temptation to withdraw and self-isolate. Research shows that as many as half of all people with a substance use disorder have depressive symptoms. Worsening mental health and bouts of depression can make us want to steer clear of other people. By being around others who might share the same struggles and creating goals with them, you’re encouraged to be more accountable, even through waves of depression.

A guide stone for growth and personal development

Developing interpersonal skills in recovery is critical for growing and developing in new ways. The relationships formed in recovery can act as a mirror that reflects growth and improvements throughout the process. Having supportive people around can remind us of our achievements, however small they may be. We might overlook a milestone of sobriety when we don’t have supportive people around who care about our well-being.

How to build stronger relationships in recovery

As a person recovers, making amends, repairing broken relationships and forming new ones require delicate navigation. Honesty and accountability are essential to building healthy, long-lasting relationships.

Here are useful steps to help guide you in forming new relationships as you recover:

Form a stronger relationship with yourself

Going through the transformation of substance recovery means you also have to evaluate the way you see and treat yourself. Self-love and compassion are often the cornerstones of successful addiction recovery.

Begin by reflecting on your self-perception and habits. Make a list of how you think about and treat yourself. Are you overly critical or harsh? Do you seek short-term comfort at the expense of your long-term well-being? Be gentle but honest; mistreating yourself often makes a person mistreat others.

Create boundaries

As the recovery process will likely transform most areas of your life, setting healthy boundaries becomes important. These boundaries are needed to support you stay sober and should be respected by others, as well as yourself. Psychologists often sing the praises of changing the “People, places and things” around you to support addiction recovery. This means removing the triggers that cause cravings for the substance you’re recovering from.

Your mind learns to respond to triggers through a process called conditioning. If someone close to you suggests meeting at a pub, creating a boundary and choosing somewhere else is perfectly okay. The smells, sights and even sounds of tinkling glasses in a place like a pub can increase the urge to drink again.

Create relationship and recovery goals

Substance dependence is directly linked with impaired-decision making. Naturally, your ability to make healthier decisions improves after you’ve spent time sober. This is the best time to set goals for long-term sobriety and the kinds of relationships you want in your life.

Start by identifying the qualities you value most in others, whether romantic relationships or friendships. Creating a list of these attributes can help you align future relationships with your personal values and aspirations. If addiction has been a part of your life for many years, you may not have considered your own ethical values for some time. Take this moment to rediscover and prioritise them.

Recognise the importance of your goals and ensure that any new relationships complement, rather than compromise, your journey toward lasting recovery and self-improvement.

Make amends and repair damaged past relationships

Once you’ve worked on the earlier steps, you may feel more prepared to address strained or broken relationships over the years. Rebuilding these connections takes time and care, and it’s important to approach the process with patience and honesty. Reflect on the dynamics of each relationship, acknowledging past mistakes and identifying areas that need to change.

When reaching out to mend a relationship, have open and honest conversations with the other person. Share your intentions, listen to their perspective and work together to rebuild trust. However, it’s also crucial to recognise when a relationship may remain unhealthy despite your efforts. In such cases, “letting go” might not be the easiest, but it is the healthiest decision.

Sometimes, the other person may not be ready or willing to repair the relationship. While it can be painful, respecting their decision is part of the healing process. Focus on moving forward with compassion for yourself and others as you continue your recovery journey.

Getting addiction treatment with UKAT

Starting to build healthy relationships in recovery isn’t easy. Following goals and adhering to your boundaries is important, yet being patient and loving toward yourself is also essential. Complete recovery needs to be taken one step at a time. If you or a loved one are struggling to break free from addiction, this is where we want to reach out.

Here at UKAT, we incorporate healthy relationship-building into our detox programmes for holistic wellness. Our expert staff support you through every stage of recovery and give you the tools you need for lifelong sobriety.

The help you need is only one click or phone call away. Reach out to us today to take the first step toward your recovery.